Monthly Archives: June 2013

Old Man College Student

Here are some things I have noticed as an old man going back to college.

1) The Teachers are almost the same age as me. This means that when they try to act like life experience is the greatest thing ever, I can laugh. (I do laugh) During my Tech Writing class we had to do a resume, and the teacher said that we simply did not have enough work experience to have a resume larger than one page. I raised my hand, and she immediately corrected the statement.

2) Some of the Students are not as smart as I wanted them to be. Oh My God, was I that dumb when I was in college the first time? My .75 grade point suggests that indeed I was (that is right POINT 75)

3) Going to Class is of utmost importance to success. Wish I would have learned this lesson about 13 years earlier.

4) There are many other Old man and Old woman college students. I feared I would be the lone elder, but there are others of my kind. So, take heart if you are considering going back to school.

5) I am not as dumb as I thought I was. I was having anxiety attacks about going back, fearing failure, but I realized that I can do it if I just put my full effort into it.



Posted by on June 29, 2013 in From the Desk of the Author


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A Different Take on Berg


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Posted by on June 25, 2013 in Penn's Diary


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Posted by on June 21, 2013 in Penn's Diary


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Larkin Dane

Larkin Dane


Posted by on June 20, 2013 in Penn's Diary


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Writing Assignment for Tech Writing

The assignment was to properly use fifteen of my vocabulary and spelling words in a paragraph.

Tell me how you think I did.


The pretentious old man believed that his true legacy would be fully realized posthumously. He had taken every possible measure to ensure that his spirit would remain long after his body was devoid of life. The elderly man had placed the pedagogy for his young apprentice to follow; although he feared the ostentatious boy would do nothing more than jeopardize his plan. Still, he was invaluable to the dying teacher due to his inherent goodness and virtual abyssal amount of knowledge. The student felt that a lingering spirit, with no vessel to fill, was a not only a paradox but also extremely dangerous. Yet he followed his mentor’s orders and stated the words of magic in emphatic tones and with perfect syntax.  One wrong syllable or inflection would obliterate both teacher and student. Everything went according to plan, and the magic began to intercede. The youth and pride of the student was no match for the wisdom of the teacher, and the old man’s spirit forced itself into the boy’s body. The teacher casually walked away from the dying student; it would take him a few days to get used to his new pseudonym but it was far better than death.


Posted by on June 19, 2013 in From the Desk of the Author


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Ties That Bind (chapter 10)


Ties That Bind

Chapter Ten

The Alliance

“You didn’t see what I saw,” Qari screamed as Calidorn carried him through the forest. “I will kill them all.”

Calidorn tried to calm the man down, but Qari was having no part of it. He had seen the vile and nefarious manner in which the monkeys were feeding on the blood of humans. The mere thought caused him to once again fight back the urge to vomit.

Bynn appreciated the man’s enthusiasm for killing the monkeys, but realized that it was not the right time to make a stand. Silkwood was close enough that the elf believed the group stood a good chance of making it before the monkeys completely washed over them. Bynn threw the magical trident to Qari when he had finally calmed down enough to be put down by Calidorn. “I promise, you will get your chance at revenge,” Bynn offered, “But not now.”

Calidorn and Batoonsta never slowed in their dash for safety. The elephant man and the minotaur were far slower than the elves and Qari, and they had no intention of being overtaken by the blood monkeys. Vaidon stayed with Bynn and Qari as they argued.

Finally, Qari conceded that the fight would come another day. However, that notion was abandoned as the man saw Rolo getting chased by three wild monkeys. The anteater would be killed if no one intervened. Bynn let loose two quick arrows, and two of the creatures fell. The last monkey grabbed Rolo’s tail and set his feet against the pulling anteater. Qari drove his new trident through the creature’s chest, and urged Rolo to safety. Rolo followed Calidorn and Batoonsta.

The salvation of Rolo had cost Qari and elves their advantage. The blood monkeys were closing in on the group. “Vaidon, go with the others and send help as quickly as possible.” The female elf hesitated and almost argued, but something told her that Bynn was right. They would need help. She sprinted straight for Silkwood, but the monkeys cut her off. A half dozen of the creatures darted between her and the path to the elven city. Vaidon never slowed as she continued to run directly at the beasts. She cut down two with one mighty swing of her sword; however, the others clawed and scratched at her as she passed. The wounds were not nearly fatal, but they were certainly painful. They also slowed her down, which allowed more monkeys to get in front of her.

The demon monkey led the charge on Bynn and Qari. Bynn knew that the great monkey was somehow protected from his arrows, so he continued to launch arrows into the horde of blood monkeys that followed their master. Qari ran right at the demon monkey as the elf’s arrows thinned the troops.

“More blood for the monkey god,” the demon shouted as he leveled a stone club at the charging human. Qari lowered his spear in the hopes of skewering the beast. The demon monkey easily parried the attack, but it did not account for the magic of the trident. Qari wretched the stone club from the demon’s clutches. Instinctively, the man pulled the club free and swung it at the face of his foe.

There was a sickening crack as the club hit the monkey in the left eye. Blood poured from the shattered socket where an eye was resided. The demon monkey dropped to his knees and clutched his bleeding face. The blood monkeys hesitated; their lord had just been defeated. Qari aimed another strike, but before he could attack the monkey disappeared in an eruption of blood.

Bynn grabbed Qari and took advantage of the blood monkeys’ confusion. They may make it to Silkwood after all.

The monkeys in Vaidon’s path were too far away to know about the defeat of the demon, so they continued form in front of the elf. Vaidon was injured; every step sent waves of pain through her legs.  The monkeys in front of her would kill her if she continued; however, the monkeys behind her would kill her if she stopped. Vaidon had no choice but to press forward. Suddenly, the jaguar appeared and slaughtered the monkeys in the elf’s way. Vaidon stumbled and the great cat leaped over her and killed the monkeys behind her. Then the jaguar took her collar in its mouth and carried her off as if she were one of its cubs.

Bynn and Qari quickly followed on the same path the jaguar had opened for them. As the duo neared Silkwood, they noticed volleys of arrows raining down behind them. The elves were driving the monkeys away from the city. Batoonsta and Calidorn were already resting when Qari found them. Rolo was curled into a tight ball next to the elephant, and Qari jumped on him and buried him in a hug. Bynn found Vaidon sitting with her back against the giant jaguar as the beast lay on the ground. The jaguar gave a low growl as Bynn approached the wounded female, but Vaidon gave him a soothing pat to show that it was alright. The good news was that everyone was safe. The bad news was that Tira Al Lung had been right about the monkeys.


Posted by on June 15, 2013 in Penn's Diary


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Gimmy’s Past (revisited)


 “Where is she?” Poffo Rosetti screamed. He grabbed one of his many servants by the collar. “Where is she?” he repeated. The halfling was a head taller than his servant, and weighed twice as much. Poffo wore nothing but a heavy crimson robe and a gold medallion, which dangled around his fat neck in the same manner that his unmentionables swung between his fat thighs.

“Who? Who?”  the halfling servant asked desperately.

“My wife!” Poffo shouted. The servant hesitated. He was scared to point out that “my wife” only narrowed it down to about seventy-five women of all different races. Poffo understood the man’s pause, and attempted to clarify. “The gnome one with the short hair.” Now it was narrowed down to about six. “I don’t remember her name. OK. But she is missing.” He walked the halfling servant to an open door, and pointed inside. “The one that stayed in here.”

The servant, whose name Poffo didn’t recall either, looked inside the room. “That is Gimmy’s room, my lord.” The two halflings walked inside and took stock of the empty room.

“I didn’t say that I cared what her name was. I just said that I didn’t KNOW what it was.” Poffo looked around and noticed what looked like blood on the floor. “What is that?” He pointed at the spot.

“It is blood, sir.” The servant knelt down for a closer look, and he covered mouth to keep from throwing up his breakfast. He looked to Poffo and saw his master staring back at him expectantly. “And it looks like… like um….”

“Spit it out!”

“It looks like skin.”

Poffo Rosetti bent over, which was not a pretty sight, and picked up the bloody skin. He turned it over in his fat hands, fingering the brand that he placed on all of his wives. Poffo shook his head, admiring the gnome’s mental and physical fortitude. “Where did she get a knife?”

“The better question is, where did she get this?” the halfling had regained his composure and found a small vial. He handed it to Poffo.

Poffo took the vial and sniffed the opening. “Healing potion,” he laughed. “The dirty gnome whore got her hands on a knife AND a healing potion.” Poffo went to the window and found exactly what he expected; there were notches running down the wall, all the way to the ground. The servant did not know how to respond when Poffo Rosetti, the wealthiest halfling in Delphia, started laughing heartily.

Gimmy had earned her freedom, in Poffo’s mind at least. She deserved to be free. The same could not be said for the wives down the hall. He would find his physical needs met by them, but his mind kept going back to the gnome. She had cut his claim to her from her arm and descended to freedom. Poffo would not recognize Gimmy if he saw her on the street. She was free, and he was proud of her for it.

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Posted by on June 13, 2013 in Penn's Diary


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